A rather large tear has ruined my beautiful quilt. Jagged
and uncompromising, it offers a window to the turmoil beneath.
Do I unstitch the whole square or do I just darn the
hole?
Life is not meant to be smooth sailing, there are
currents and rapids to endure; as I go through those right now I haven take
pause to wonder whether or not I am handling it correctly.
I have friends who have blind faith; faith in God or
faith in other beliefs. As the maelstroms of life toss those friends about, I see
them clinging on to their faith; even through pained eyes they are steadfast; “everything
happens for a reason” or “it is God’s will”.
Whether or not it is through that faith that I see them
at a later stage, in calmer waters, buoyed through the storm remains a mystery
to me. But I know they believe that God saw them through.
At my end, I spend my time painstakingly stitching the
tears together, mindful that what once was a beautiful flat surface is now
marred by evidence that something ugly traversed through its very fabric,
seeking to undo the threads that hold it together. Each stitch is a reminder of
what has passed and testament to my endurance. Some stitches are painful to
gaze upon.
So, would it not be better if I too believed in a God of
miracles? A God who would toss me in the fire, them pull me out, stronger than
before? Or am I safe in rolling up my sleeves and doing damage control myself?